JohnnyMac has a new racket

Combining hees love for thees racket as well as making a helluva racket, John McEnroe made both happen in thees District of Columbia, thees past July, "entertaining a stadium full of tennis fans when hees first-place New York Sportimes took on thees Washington Kastles." The NY Sportimes lost thees match [waaah!], but I'm sure McEnroe found some new rock fans after hearing hees guitar riffs (well,, he did study under Eric Clapton,, so..). Besides, thees poster does ask "who are the greatest players in tennis today," riiight?

Poster courtesy of Madame Lamb You can hear and see Johnny Mac play hees guitar on YouTube. Not bad, eh?!

Rafa Nadal to Aussie Open next month

Rich, over at Down the Line! got a jump on me on his Video Vault. He's running a reel on Rafa in Nike's 2009 Spring Collection that he'll be wearing at the Aussie Open next month. You know I hate those Nike nappies on him! I have nothing against Nike personally - they offer great products that suit other players just honkey-dorey. Rafa isn't one of them, tho. I'm trying to talk Rafa out of this gig, but he can be pretty bull-headed at times, so... but I'll see what I can do! Anyway, go have a look-see at Down the Line! for Rafa's fashion show. Just don't tell me what ya think about Rafa's bod enclothed in them, fair?

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas everyone! Are you broke yet? Did you blow all your hard-earned dough and not get a gift from that one special person? I hate that! Guess what?!? I still have all my moolah. I just got out of prison, er, I mean the hellhole. They put me in that box. I did solitary, too. I just got out - so I didn't go Christmas shopping. And, guess what? It feels good, man. Instead, I get to loll around tomorrow thinking about what Christmas means to me.. instead of tearing open paper-crap only to find the same ol' bone they gave me last year! hmmm... less see now.. I got me 5 bones.. and.. 3.. rattles. I think the rattles were for the kid. The kid got my bones. I hate that kid. Just kidding. I don't hate anyone. I mean, what would Jesus do? Jesus would say 'Peace be with you'. That means all of us ought to live in peace. Everybody helping everybody else. Hate's bad for you. Badder than not getting any presents under the tree. Just kidding. What could be badder than not getting any presents under the tree? That's right!!! Not having a tree! I got me a tree. See!? And, if you'll notice, there's no gifts under the tree. But.. Don't cry for me, Argentina! Even if there's no bone under the tree.. I can still eat the Christmas bulbs! Just kidding. I'm not that stupid. I meant, I'll eat the tinsel. Ho! Ho! Ho! No, I don't need any gifts under the tree to celebrate the birth of Jesus. His birth is written in my heart. I'm a Christian dog, just like my Bro, Rascal. Rascal is a practicing, praying Christian furkid. We go to church together when we can. And, yes, we know there are dogs in heaven. We love Jesus because He loves all creation. Trixie and me and some of our friends went to Rafa's Christmas Party tonight. Photo by EllenJo on Flickr Photo by Flinschrod on Flickr At his party, Rafa presented me with a gift as soon as we were able to slip away from his guests. We went out on the veranda and stood near the railing holding paws hands. Our eyes locked for what seemed like an eternity; the spell broken only as he slid his gift into my paws. I didn't open it there; I was afraid someone might see me unwrapping his gift and then *POW* all those dern light bulbs start going off..soooo.. I just quickly licked his cheek and we went back inside to dance. the. tango. And tangle we did. Then the rumba. I had to kick off my heels. The samba dislocated my hips; that was the end of our dancing. Where that ended, drinking began. First I sipped some milk out of my slipper.. and eventually wound up gulping all the rummed-up egg nog I could find in the house. O, Lordy. That was a mistake. After several hours, I had to call it "a night" and Ruffie summoned the limo to take me and my honchos back to the hacienda. I was a fright to see, they tell me. By the way, do I look fat in this outfit?!? Photo by Whitogreen on Flickr The last straw was when some big ol' fat, bearded guy swooped me up in his arms as I was about to relieve myself under his chair, I guess,, .. and I swear he had me ina choke hold,, swearing under his breath, calling me a ho. But I really don't remember too much about that last hour at the party, but Rafa called me this morning to tell me he loved the pic of me on Santa's lap. Ho! Ho! Ho! Photo by Byron Raphael on Flickr I hope you're better behaved than me and don't you dare drink and drive. Have a good one, All.

You Won't Believe What Happened to MI..!!!

O, the trauma! O, the humilitation! The hor-rors! O, that dirty, dirty box! Bwaaaaaaarrr! OMG! My friends. My furfriends. My poor, poor, bruised pysche! Thank gawd for Trixie. Trixie.. Trixie.. my good and faithful *gasp* Trixie! I'm in your debt. (I will find a way to pay it.. believe me. The thought of you holding anything over me,, is, well,, *retch*) Okay. Okay! You want to know what happened. (omg,, the trauma,,) Halloween. It happened on Halloween night,, walking back to my digs. I was snatched by the Animal Catcher *ack* and slammed into a box into the back of a van!

Photo by PD Cagliastro on Flickr I couldn't breath! I couldn't think! I couldn't move! I could pee tho,, and did. Right there in the box,, in the corner,, I thought I'd get that over with before the black electric cord interroga.. treatment.

I don't know how long I was in that frickin dern box before I was thrown into th.. th.. that cage. I was so inconsolable because the cage was dirty - and it smelled, too. I'm sure it's an old technique to make you puke so they can blame that on you, too! Thus, necessitating another round of beatings.. (/sarcasm)

I was blindfolded and moved to another facility. I was so,, so scared. Trembling, too!

I don't know how long I was imprisoned in this dreadful hellhole before Trixie found out who had snatched me and where they threw me into the brig. She got a band of brothers (BOB) together to bust me out! Kewl. They were cute, too.

I felt like a fool when Trixie told me I had to put on a stupid camouflage outfit because my BOB was coming in on an Onassis barge. They were taking advantage *rolling eyes* of the waterway running through the dogpound hellhole I was hostage to *bwarrr*

All this time nobody knew where I was: not my family, not my friends, and especially, not my Ruffie! I missed his matches and he missed my adoration - I'm positive of this!

What!?! You don't believe me?!?