O, the trauma! O, the humilitation! The hor-rors! O, that dirty, dirty box! Bwaaaaaaarrr! OMG! My friends. My furfriends. My poor, poor, bruised pysche! Thank gawd for Trixie. Trixie.. Trixie.. my good and faithful *gasp* Trixie! I'm in your debt. (I will find a way to pay it.. believe me. The thought of you holding anything over me,, is, well,, *retch*) Okay. Okay! You want to know what happened. (omg,, the trauma,,) Halloween. It happened on Halloween night,, walking back to my digs. I was snatched by the Animal Catcher *ack* and slammed into a box into the back of a van!
Photo by PD Cagliastro on Flickr
I couldn't breath! I couldn't think! I couldn't move!
I could pee tho,, and did. Right there in the box,, in the corner,, I thought I'd get that over with before the black electric cord interroga.. treatment.
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I don't know how long I was in that frickin dern box before I was thrown into th.. th.. that cage. I was so inconsolable because the cage was dirty - and it smelled, too. I'm sure it's an old technique to make you puke so they can blame that on you, too! Thus, necessitating another round of beatings.. (/sarcasm)
I was blindfolded and moved to another facility. I was so,, so scared. Trembling, too!
I don't know how long I was imprisoned in this dreadful hellhole before Trixie found out who had snatched me and where they threw me into the brig. She got a band of brothers (BOB) together to bust me out! Kewl. They were cute, too.
I felt like a fool when Trixie told me I had to put on a stupid camouflage outfit because my BOB was coming in on an Onassis barge. They were taking advantage *rolling eyes* of the waterway running through the dogpound hellhole I was hostage to *bwarrr*
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All this time
nobody knew where I
was: not my family, not my friends, and
especially,
not my
Ruffie! I missed his matches and he missed my adoration - I'm positive of this!
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What!?! You don't
believe me?!?
2 comments:
OMG, You have to watch out for them thar dog catchers. Next time you find yourself in that kind of a bind, just yell as CHIHUATUDE as loud as you can. We will round up the Wonder Chi's, and send them your way.
O, thank you, thank you, kind, dear Mr. Eric S for letting me know about the Wonder Chi's (are they like the BOBs [band of brothers] or a better brand of Cheez Whiz? inquiring minds, you know..?) and bless you for your support of my brothers and sisters of Chi! \o/
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